What Makes YOU Happy?
Happiness is an interesting concept. What makes you happy? It’s relative to your situation and circumstances, right?
The things that make us happy are rooted in our value system. Once we have solidified our values, we can determine how those values translate into a happy life. In a culture that promotes fairytales that end in Happily Ever After people are at odds with the process of becoming and for some reason most can’t imagine that problems persist in the “ever after”.
Here’s one way to organize your thinking before answering the question -What makes you happy?
1. Start by thinking about what things don’t make you happy.
List things that you acquired or things that you did that you thought would make you happy- but did not. Make sure you understand why these things didn’t make you happy.
2. Next, list the things that you think will make you happy, since you’ve figured out what doesn’t. Articulate what you expect to gain.
Now that we have come to conclusions about the past, let’s talk about the present.
3. Make a third list of the things that bring you joy right now.
The places you go, things you do. The people you enjoy spending time with. Acknowledge all the reasons why.
Now, take a GOOD LOOK; step three will help to measure how satisfied you are with your current surroundings. Do you need to make adjustments? Contentment is a worthy goal in and of itself, BUT this isn’t the same as settling. Don’t get it twisted!
Based on what you have learned about yourself from these lists, it’s time to think about your actual values. You may need a little help here in your brainstorming. Try a Google search on keyword: values. Narrow that list down to 10.
Be as honest as possible with yourself. Its fine if having status or a lot of money is meaningful for you; by the same token, if you realize you don’t care what kind of car you drive, that’s okay too. Test your values as you narrow down to 10. Ask yourselves the hard questions: Is this truly something you want, or is something you think you should want?
4. Once you have ten values listed, try ordering them one to ten. This may be a difficult exercise but don’t stress. The order can change, and you may delete from this list overtime. The idea here is to have some sense of priorities when you have to compromise on what you want.
5. Once you have your list of values prioritized, brainstorm what you need to do to get those things.
For example, if independence is one of your values, think about what that means to you. Do you want to work for yourself? If so, what steps do you need to take to start your own business? Do this with each of your values.
6. Write a list of goals that will help you achieve the happiness that you need based on the values you have discovered within yourself.
We face constant pressure from our peers, from the media and from society in general to find happiness in certain things. The truth is that we are all different, and what makes us happy is different. As we grow, change and learn new things our values change. What we share is the capacity to create our own happiness and participate in what makes other people happy once we understand what we need.
